Huh?

Streak Over

After the ugliest of losses on Friday night, a nice win yesterday to stop the losing streak. We never do much against 68-year-old Tim Wakefield, but we did enough, thanks to Igawa's stepping in after Karstens had his leg broken by a line drive by the first batter of the game. Perhaps the key with Igawa is not knowing what day he's going to pitch -- but with Karstens gone Igawa is going to have to find a way to pitch well when he does know when his turn is.

And after a brutal 1/3 of an inning on Friday, and having to listen to McCarver and Buck deliver what sounded like Mariano's eulogy, Mariano came in and overmatched the Boston hitters he faced, allowing a broken-bat single to Varitek, and then inducing two weak grounders and a popup to close out the game. A shame he can't pitch against Boston any more, isn't it, Joe? Tim?

Losers.


Joe Is Safe?

I'm totally not buying that Torre's job was in jeopardy if we had gotten swept this weekend. This is the sort of story that "sources" feed gullible sportswriters and which said hacks are all too happy to regurgitate to a credulous fan base.

George is more out of it than into it, and Cashman for reasons unknown to me continues to think that Torre is still the manager he was six years ago. His job wasn't in jeopardy.

But what I didn't need to hear was Joe and Tim's continual apologizing for Torre's brutal handling of the pitching thus far. I understand as well as anyone that the starters haven't been so good and that there's been injuries. But what Torre has failed to see is that April isn't August, that the fifth and sixth innings aren't "late" and that managing these games like they are playoff games can't possibly work when he should have seen how his chewing up the bullpen last year killed us.

And, dirty little secret -- our starters, even with the injuries, etc., aren't the worst. Every team is going to have a run where the starters don't get very deep into games, but the way Torre manages, the starters know that even with a four-run lead, allowing one damn base runner in the seventh inning (or even the sixth, often) is going to get them yanked. What a great way to have to pitch! Not!

Many of our pitching problems are manager-inflicted. And how many extra games have we won as a result of Torre's scorched-earth managing in April? Versus how many extra we will lose over the course of a season?

(I theorized, jokingly, to iris, that perhaps there is a donation made to some charity every time Joe makes a pitching change . . . . or that AT&T (sponsor of the "AT&T Call to the Bullpen") is heavy in Joe's portfolio.)

Joe's job is safe. That's as certain as Mike Meyers showing up in the sixth inning for a "key matchup."

Almost Comical.

"Trouble In Tampa," starring Mike Meyers (and featuring Joe Torre)

Good news: Wang back! Matsui homers! A Yankee starter glimpses the 7th inning!
Bad news: Games still last 9 innings.

Wang pitched well, got a bit tired in the seventh and left with a one-run lead and runners on second and third and one out.

Enter Vizcaino. This would be his fifth appearance in six games, and he hasn't been effective at all lately. Perfect choice, no?

But wait. Just in case Vizcaino isn't under enough pressure, let's issue an intentional walk to load the bases. Margin for error? That's for sissies!

Vizcano falls behind 2-0. He battles back to 2-2, doesn't' get a call on a close pitch to make it 3-2. I am wondering whether the 3-2 pitch is going to be hit out or simply clear the bases.

The 3-2 pitch is nice and fat but it gets lined to short. Ugly pitch, good result, somehow. Two outs. We could get out of this, maybe. Yeah!

I watch Mike Meyers taking the mound and then I know we're not getting out of this. In fact it wouldn't surprise me if Crawford hits a --

I never get to complete the thought, the ball goes into the seats so fast.

And for the first time since the early 90s, when the Yankees were horribly, pathetically bad, I actually laughed. There was just nothing else to do. And after the laughing I'm just numb, and all I can think about is the stupid bookkeeping aspect of it. Wang gets charged for two of those runs, and gets the loss. Vizcaino gets charged for a run, for intentionally walking a guy. And Meyers gets one charged with one crummy run for blowing up the game. [Meyers also gets a blown save . . . oh boy.] [I have a much better bookkeeping system for situations like this, but now isn't the time.]

It's almost comical. Almost. Using Vizcaino five games out of six when he's pitching poorly. The love affair with Meyers when he's done little to warrant such devotion. The idiots who will very soon start blaming A-Rod for the Yankees' poor showing. I really do want to laugh, to be able to fid it truly funny.

If only I could.

Penthouse to Pavement.

Boston 7, Yankees 6

Last night's game took me from the almost giddy heights to the crushing numb depths. A-Rod takes Curt "Celebrity Fit Club" Schilling deep, twice. The drunks stuffing Fenway are practically silent. Life is good.

Then it all goes wrong. Immediately I blamed Joe. I was so mad I could hardly see straight.

But I've had a night to sleep on it, to mull it over, to rationally consider all the angles.

And I blame Joe.

1. Pettitte didn't have his best, but got through 6.1 innings only giving up two runs and using 100 pitches in the process. OK, Joe takes him out at that point. I can't quibble too much . . . personally I'd have given Andy another 10-15 pitches and see if maybe he might get a couple of quick outs. But all right. Three run lead. 8 outs to get.

2. Proctor comes in and gets the last two outs in the seventh. OK.

3. Top 8, we tack on a run. Excellent.

Now the fish starts to rot from the head, and rapidly.

4. Mike Meyers comes out to start the eighth. Mike Meyers? Our supposed "matchup lefty" is starting an inning with a four-run lead? Against David Oritz, who I can't ever remember Meyers actually getting out. Amazing, truly. I don't even need to have the TV on to know that Oritz gets a hit off of Meyers. The only surprise is that it stayed in the park.

But OK, four run lead, one man on, with six outs to get . . . no biggie, jeez. I calm Myself down.

5. Enter Luis Vizcaino. I do a double take. We have two pitchers named Luis Vizcaino, and just called up the other one from Scranton? I mean, that has to be it, right? There's no way Joe is bringing in the guy who just yesterday got abused by Cleveland and threw thirty pitches in the process, right?

Ummm . . . wrong. It is the same Vizcaino. I guess Joe is going on the "get back on the horse that trampled and horribly maimed you" theory.

6. Well, shucks, it doesn't start out too well. He walks Manny. I'm not sure but I think Meyers could've done that. Drew grounds out, moving up the runners. One out.

Whew, OK, sanity is restored. Two on, four run lead, five outs to get. Cake.

7. But then Lowell singles. Ortiz scores. Still, I'm not too upset. That was Meyers' run, it was richly deserved, and we're still up by three with a nice slow guy on first. Get Varitek to hit a ground ball and the inning's over.

Yankees are stalling and Mariano is warming up. Rut roh.

8. Mariano comes in for the "five-out save" (would that it ended up that way).

Now, I thought we weren't doing this this year, using Mariano for more than one inning. But OK, hmm . . . he hasn't pitched since Sunday when Marco Scutaro (yes the Marco Scutaro) took him deep for a walk-off loss. Maybe he needs the work.

9. Varitek and his 1-something average up. Mariano gets ahead but can't put him away and Varitek gets a hit. Manny scores, Lowell makes it to second without falling.

I'm starting to get a bad feeling, but then I calm myself. We're still up by two. And Crisp is up for goodness sakes. That was Vizcaino's run and it was richly deserved. Mariano will knock the bat out of Cereal Boy's hands, then strike out the next guy, and that's that.

10. Except I didn't figure on one thing: Mariano throwing a pitch the ONE PLACE where Crisp could hit it hard -- down and in with nothing on it. Crisp grounds to where Mank should have been playing and it's a game-tying triple. I had moved anything handy to throw through the TV screen. Smart move on my part.

Now I know what happens. Red Sox will get this run in, bring in Paperboy, and that's the game.

11. Sure enough the feared Joey Cora singles in the go-ahead run. Cora is thrown out stealing and Lugo strikes out. But it doesn't matter. Might as well be a 12-run lead.

12. But the dagger does need to be twisted one final time. Paperboy is not available, since he's pitched two days in a row.

Enter Okajima who does a perfectly fine job.

Red Sox win 7-6 in a game they had no business ever getting close in. Joe's brutal handling of pitchers and complete lack of game feel strikes again.

And while Mariano's location had been crappy, something about these two losses bothers me more: They say the stuff is there, but if Mariano's stuff was really there, couldn't he make mistakes to Marco Scutaro and Coco Crisp inside and get away with it?

iris said to me last night, more than once, "it's going to be a long year." I believe the sweet girl is correct.

Yankees Win! Yankees Win!

Twin Killing

Two nice wins. Obivously our starting pitching couldn't be as bad as it looked the first time through the rotation, and getting out of arctic temperatures has helped the defense tremendously.

I was talking to a Twins' Fan last night, and I said something along the lines of "I'm not sure how your Ponson experiment is going to work out." His reponse, of the many he might have chosen, was, "Ponson dind't pitch that badly." While not all of hte Yankee hits Monday night off Ponson were exactly scalded, where Ponson kills you is his total inability to respond to adversity. He can pitch well, but usually it's when everything goes right and he pitches well from the very beginning; when things go badly with Ponson they tend to keep going badly.

One for Joe

I criticize Torre a lot, so when he does something I approve of it's only fair that I mention that, too.

Last night, with the Yankees up by a sizeable magin, Damon came up with men on first and second and no one out. Now, I had the absolute certainty that Torre was going to have Damon bunt the runners over. Maybe Torre wasn't thinking of it, even, I don't know, but I felt sure he would bunt.

The pitching coach came out to the mound to talk to Boof Bonser. My exchange with hte aforementioned Twins' fan went something like this:

Me: He's giving him one of those extra-special pitching coach pep talks. [Note: Pitching coach visits to the mound are a pet peeve of mine -- I believe they are ridiculous and generally unnecessary -- they exist mainly so that the manager looks like he's "managing."]
Twins' Fan: More likely they're talking about how to defense it when Damon bunts.
(I'm thinking maybe he's right, since I do figure Torre's bunting here.)
(Then Damon smashes the Bonser offering for a 3-run homer!)
Me (giddy): Guess that wasn't the "good" pep talk.
Twins Fan: I guess he wasn't bunting.

Good move not having Damon bunt, Joe . . . and I thought that before Damon hit one out.

Totally Hot

A-Rod went deep again last night. I am not sure that I personally have ever seen a baseball hit harder.

It's great to see A-Rod on fire like this. I know it won't matter . . . when he has his first slump, when he makes his first bad/costly error, the idiots will be booing again. And the bigger idiots will be talking about him "doing it in October."

It's OK. I see the look on Alex's face these days, like it's taking all he's got not to just burst out laughing, he'shaving so much fun, and I realize that the idiots don't matter to him.

So they don't matter.

Smarten up. You are watching possibly the best player ever. People decades from now will look at his numbers and laugh at the idea that "fans" booed him.

Have We Started Yet?

Yankees 10, Orioles 7

Ugly win. Off day. Rainout. Ugly loss. Listless and ugly loss. Ugly win.

Not a good start, despite A-Rod's titanic walk-of grand slam. (I think I heard a couple of A-Rod haters complain that A-Rod was showing off -- a single would've done it. I'm kidding. I hope. Please, all you idiots who feel compelled to mindlessly trash A-Rod, please, get some help, before it's too late. This includes a number of NY sportswriters -- more on that plague upon the NY sports scene below.)

Watching these first four games, if feels like the Yankees were caught by surprise that the season started when it did, because they're playing as though it's about March 20th. And in this I have to blame Joe -- a baseball manager has precious few real tasks -- getting the team ready for the beginning of the season is a pretty important item among that limited set.

Speaking of Ugly

Igawa was the first Yankee starter to pitch five innings. The bullpen is now officially shot, in case you were wondering. These short, ineffective outings by starters are flipping that Pavlovian switch in Joe's head; you can almost hear him muttering under his breath "must use bullpen . . . must use bullpen." Henn and Bruney, who look great now, will age before our eyes as they are ground down by constant (over)use.

After Today's Game . . .

Brian Cashman and Joe Torre spoke after today's game.

Torre: So, should I call Scott or do you want to?
Cashman: Scott?
Torre (swigging green tea): Yeah . . . Scott Boras . . .
Cashman: Huh? What? You think A-Rod deserves a raise?
Laughter. More tea-swigging. Torre belches quietly.
Torre: Ummm . . . no, Brian . . . another . . . client?
Cashman looks puzzled a moment then understands.
Cashman: No, Joe! Absolutely not. Bernie will not be on this team this year.
Torre: Well, I just thought, Brian . . . you know, Damon's day to day, Matsui is hurt, Abreu got hit on the ankle, that was scary . . . we just . . .
Cashman gets up and walks away, waving as he walks.
Cashman: I gotta run, Joe. Talk to you soon. About anything but this.
Torre: (calling after Cashman's retreating form) Sorry, Brian . . . jeez, I just figured . . .
Torre finishes his green tea. Skippy the ballboy, promoted to a clubhouse job this year, quietly offers Joe his highlight reel DVD.

Time for a change

During today's game, the Orioles had the bases loaded and Melvin Mora hit a blooper into the Bermuda Triangle in shallow right field. It falls in. Two runs score. Abreu fields it and throws it to second and Mora is a dead duck. Except Jeter can't handle the throw and a third run scores.

The official scorer, amazingly, ruled this a double and three RBIs. The runner who'd been on first, Dave Roberts I think it was, had stopped at third, and only ran home when Jeter bobbled the throw from the outfield. The correct scoring is single, two RBIs, and an error on Jeter (or E-9 I suppose, but I think Jeter should catch that throw) allowing Mora to reach second and Roberts to score. And really it's not that difficult to arrive at the right scoring call.

Egregiously wrong scoring calls are common in MLB.

OK, I understand that it doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things. It's not altering the result of the game. And yet, if it's worth having an official score, and thus an official scorer, it's worth having it done correctly. Home-town sportswriters get the gig, and frankly, by and large they're terrible at it.

And I understand why. They have to get quotes from these guys -- their jobs often depend upon at least minimal cooperation from the players. And players are, as we all have seen, an oversensitive lot-- they don't appreciate why they feel are bogus errors or questionable earned runs on their records. The sportswriters are all too happy to oblige. And even if the player(s) in question don't talk a lot to the media, the sportswriters still have to be around them. Familiarity breeds contempt -- in this case contempt for the integrity of the official scoring job.

Time to yank this little perk from the hometown sportswriters. MLB should hire a staff of official scorekeepers, beholden to no one except whoever their boss in the MLB office is.

And away we go.

Yankees 9, Devil Rays 5

All sorts of good things happened today.

1. Carol Pavano didn't get hurt before, during, or presumably after his start today.
2. A-Rod had 2 hits, including a HR.
3. The lineup hit well, pretty much all the way up and down. Against a LHP, too, which a few talking heads on ESPN said would give the Yankees trouble.
4. The bullpen performed admirably.

And a couple of not so good things, too.

1. Pavano melted down in the 5th, necessitating all those strong innings from the bullpen.
2. Three errors, including one each by the couple who aren't as close as they once were, A-Rod and Jeter.

Overall, I do go with the Pat Riley plan, i. e., no griping after a win. But last year we ran into problems because: 1) our starters weren't' going deep enough into ballgames, and 2) Joe made a lot of panic moves going to the pen (some of that is attributable to the starters, some to Joe just being weak at handling pitchers when said pitchers are not studs).

OK. We're 1-0. The bullpen isn't shot. Yet.

Royals 7, Red Sox 1

Remember when I wrote that Gil Meche getting $11 million a year from the Royals was totally stupid, irresponsible, and ridiculous?

All I can say is . . . wow, was I ever wrong. Gil Meche is My new favorite non-Yankee player. He's worth all $11 million and then some. 7.1 innings, 1 run, against Boston today. Gil is the man! Give him a raise and an extension! Now!

I saw the last couple innings of this game on ESPN after getting home from work. Sadly, Bozo and Balloon-Head (Joe Morgan and John Miller) were calling the game. How these two remain employed by a national outlet like ESPN is totally beyond Me. From the frequent factual mistakes, the annoying over-pronunciation of all words and names Latino by Miller, Morgan's near-illiteracy, and the general buffoonery and unprofessionalism, these two are a train wreck that you really can stop watching. If only there was an alternative.

Note to Morgan: "Big Papi" is not on David Ortiz' birth certificate. Honestly. Calling him by his nickname is acceptable once, twice, even three times. But not every time you mention the player.

Cubs to be sold. Cubs lose!

Real estate investor Sam Zell is buying the Tribune Co., owners of the Cubs. He is keeping all the media assets together. He is selling the Cubs. He will get less for them than he would've a few months ago before the Tribune Co. pumped the payroll way up.

Oh, and the Cubs lost. How long before Lou dumps the kinder gentler act and has his first tirade?